whaaaaat? you whaat? no waaay?!
hush, keep your voice down. the last thing i need is for you to broadcast to the whole world, thankyouverymuch!
no friggin' way...! seriously?!
.....
*********
why does the receiving end of a secret always seemed all hyped up, enthusiastic even, and extremely eager when told there's a secret to be shared, kinda like a 5 yr-old whose mom says "now be good and i'll give you a sweet"? can't say i know for sure, but its not too hard to guess. well for one, being the secret keeper makes one feel special. even if he/she is not the only person knowing the secret, the fact that it's one means it's forbidden to be spoken in public - and we all know that anything that's forbidden always make it more sexy/appealing/exciting/dangerous or even [insert your own adjective here].
secondly, knowing another's secret means you have extra knowledge that many others don't know. the notion that you know more than others and that you can trade it with someone else for your own benefit (if you're that kinda person) in the expense of others makes you feel good. or sometimes, one would even argue that it's not benevolent if the listeners don't know the subject of the secret: it could be a juicy gossip when conversations run dry, to prevent awkward moments of silence from filling up the crevices between you and whoever (most typically someone you wanna impress).
then there are those who needed secrets to "endorse" their friendships. secrets are, to them, a kind of bond that brings him/her closer to the friend, a sort of unspoken trust given to the secret keeper as an affirmation of their friendship. secrets relayed beneath layers of superficial conversations, private and confidential, something only important people/friends are privileged to know. or so they would like to think.
that's all good, but that's not what got me dwelling on this subject. if secrets are really what they are, why then, are they being told to others? isn't it superfluous for secret weavers to weave a secret only to undo them right after? why are people so strange!
and then, as soon as i began to wonder, i saw the light.. well almost. this is merely my speculation. :P you see, the first thing about secrets, is that they are comprised of something that shouldn't be known to all. i.e. there has to be elements of untruthfulness, lies, mistakes that shan't be spoken of due to possible self-embarrassment etc. in most cases, secrets are never any good (hence the phrase 'deep dark secret', no?). which led me to this conclusion: secret weavers, i.e. those who committed certain acts which they're not proud of, refuse to disclose the 'secrets' to most people, for obvious reasons; yet they need to vent. keeping it to himself would drive him insane, hence it has to be let out, one way or another. some kept them in journals, blogs, while others confess to their friends, priest etc. thus you have people who expose their deepest, darkest secrets to their friends, hoping that those friends would keep their secrets as promised (whether or not they usually do.. that's a whole topic by itself which will be discussed another time).
but really, if you ask me, secrets are meant to be kept. people who have secrets should keep them to themselves as a kind of repentance. because once it's told to one other being, it's lifted off your shoulder and you feel much better (believe me, i know, cuz i've been there done that, much to my chagrin). and it's very very easy to forget what mistakes you've done and what lessons you've learned from it. confessions remove the feelings of guilt and remorse from oneself, but how much was retained in that person so as to not repeat the same mistake is questionable. so if you ask me, i'd say, keep the burden of your wrongdoing in you as a reminder. so that you'll never repeat the same mistakes twice.
and oh, if you're wondering. the message is for yours truly.
secrets are overrated, really.
hush, keep your voice down. the last thing i need is for you to broadcast to the whole world, thankyouverymuch!
no friggin' way...! seriously?!
.....
*********
why does the receiving end of a secret always seemed all hyped up, enthusiastic even, and extremely eager when told there's a secret to be shared, kinda like a 5 yr-old whose mom says "now be good and i'll give you a sweet"? can't say i know for sure, but its not too hard to guess. well for one, being the secret keeper makes one feel special. even if he/she is not the only person knowing the secret, the fact that it's one means it's forbidden to be spoken in public - and we all know that anything that's forbidden always make it more sexy/appealing/exciting/dangerous or even [insert your own adjective here].
secondly, knowing another's secret means you have extra knowledge that many others don't know. the notion that you know more than others and that you can trade it with someone else for your own benefit (if you're that kinda person) in the expense of others makes you feel good. or sometimes, one would even argue that it's not benevolent if the listeners don't know the subject of the secret: it could be a juicy gossip when conversations run dry, to prevent awkward moments of silence from filling up the crevices between you and whoever (most typically someone you wanna impress).
then there are those who needed secrets to "endorse" their friendships. secrets are, to them, a kind of bond that brings him/her closer to the friend, a sort of unspoken trust given to the secret keeper as an affirmation of their friendship. secrets relayed beneath layers of superficial conversations, private and confidential, something only important people/friends are privileged to know. or so they would like to think.
that's all good, but that's not what got me dwelling on this subject. if secrets are really what they are, why then, are they being told to others? isn't it superfluous for secret weavers to weave a secret only to undo them right after? why are people so strange!
and then, as soon as i began to wonder, i saw the light.. well almost. this is merely my speculation. :P you see, the first thing about secrets, is that they are comprised of something that shouldn't be known to all. i.e. there has to be elements of untruthfulness, lies, mistakes that shan't be spoken of due to possible self-embarrassment etc. in most cases, secrets are never any good (hence the phrase 'deep dark secret', no?). which led me to this conclusion: secret weavers, i.e. those who committed certain acts which they're not proud of, refuse to disclose the 'secrets' to most people, for obvious reasons; yet they need to vent. keeping it to himself would drive him insane, hence it has to be let out, one way or another. some kept them in journals, blogs, while others confess to their friends, priest etc. thus you have people who expose their deepest, darkest secrets to their friends, hoping that those friends would keep their secrets as promised (whether or not they usually do.. that's a whole topic by itself which will be discussed another time).
but really, if you ask me, secrets are meant to be kept. people who have secrets should keep them to themselves as a kind of repentance. because once it's told to one other being, it's lifted off your shoulder and you feel much better (believe me, i know, cuz i've been there done that, much to my chagrin). and it's very very easy to forget what mistakes you've done and what lessons you've learned from it. confessions remove the feelings of guilt and remorse from oneself, but how much was retained in that person so as to not repeat the same mistake is questionable. so if you ask me, i'd say, keep the burden of your wrongdoing in you as a reminder. so that you'll never repeat the same mistakes twice.
and oh, if you're wondering. the message is for yours truly.
secrets are overrated, really.
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