The Knapsack That Turned Into Swamp

used to have a lot of ideas, opinions and thoughts; they may not be the most brilliant or genius ideas but they're fresh nonetheless, swift flowing with such force like the waterfalls' current. yet i can't remember when exactly it started but at some point of life i began ignoring them and putting them aside, into this knapsack of mine, full of quirky funky and/or witty cogitations all bundled together and kept away at the end of the stick i carry on my shoulder. it's as if its a separate entity by itself, hanging a foot and a half away from me. and whilst i maintain a clear mind, i shove all my thoughts into that knapsack, thinking that they can and will be retrieved when the time comes. but when exactly is it that i would stop everything i'm doing and actually do that? well. if i were able to stop Time, then i probably would do it right now. but i can't. and even if i did slow down and decide to catch up with the thoughts that were forever 2 beats ahead of me, this knapsack carries stuff unlike the concrete materialistic objects that will stay there forever. eventually as time passes by (and we're talking about seconds here), they'll disappear.

and so as i walk my journey, my knapsack over my shoulder turned into a stale pool of puddle not unlike the swamp - which eventually will create within itself an inner sucking energy/force (you know, like how the star system was created or maybe something similar to the black hole theory) that swirls inward and sucks everything that was thrown in, deep into nothingness where i would never be able to retrieve them again. ever.

as tragic as it is, that's how it is with the products of my cognitive thinking that was abandoned in the past. and whilst i sit here in this cold night in Flagstaff, AZ, wishing i have a cup of hot cocoa to warm me up, i realize this was what happened to me all these years. and just as i started this entry so randomly, i'm gonna end it just as random and abrupt as it can get. "The End".

p.s. it's so cold here... i want my blankie and my smelly pillow and my mr bear. :/